Making Space for Grief: Finding a Way Through Loss
I’ve been reading the beautiful book The Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller, which has deeply resonated with me in thinking about grief, loss and the many ways they shape our lives.
Weller reminds us that grief arises from love. When we lose something we have deeply loved or valued, grief is a natural response. And loss is not limited to the death of someone we love. We can grieve the loss of a relationship, a job or career, our health, a sense of identity, a place we called home, a friendship, a hoped-for future or an unrealised dream. We can even experience grief in response to the suffering we witness in the world and the destruction of the natural environment.
There is so much loss in our lives and in the world around us, yet many of us have never been taught how to be with grief.
As a culture, we can feel uncomfortable with strong emotions. We may expect ourselves to “move on” quickly or return to normal after a funeral or difficult event. Beyond the rituals surrounding a death, there is often little space in our busy lives to acknowledge what has been lost. We may mourn quietly, privately and sometimes alone.
Perhaps you have been told to be strong. Perhaps you don't want to burden others with your sadness. Or perhaps you are struggling with feelings that you don't fully understand.
Grief can take many forms.
Sometimes it looks like profound sadness or longing. Sometimes it looks like anger, anxiety, exhaustion, numbness, depression, irritability or overwhelm. You may feel stuck or disconnected from yourself and others. You may find yourself thinking about what happened repeatedly, or grieving not only what you lost but what you had hoped your life would be.
Sometimes what appears to be anxiety or depression may contain unacknowledged grief.
Counselling can provide a safe and compassionate space to explore this grief in all its forms. Together, we can slow down and give your experience the time and attention it deserves. There is no prescribed timeline for grief. Your relationship with what you have lost is unique, and your process of grieving will be unique too.
My intention is to help you hold your stories, memories and emotions without judgement. We can gently explore what the loss means to you and what you need as you navigate this new chapter. Where it feels meaningful, we can also create personal rituals or ceremonies to honour what has been lost and mark a transition.
Grief is painful, but it can also reconnect us with what matters most.
Grief reconnects us with our values, our relationships, our humanity and our sense of belonging.
When we allow ourselves to grieve, we acknowledge how deeply we have loved and how profoundly connected we are to one another. And through grief, we may gradually rediscover gratitude—for the people we have known, the experiences we have shared and the love we have received.
Grief does not mean forgetting or leaving someone or something behind. It means finding a way to carry what mattered while continuing to live.
If you are carrying a loss that feels too heavy to hold alone, I invite you to bring it into the counselling room.
Sit with your grief. Give it space. Listen to what it has to tell you.
At the threshold of grief there can be a doorway—not away from love, but back towards love, meaning, connection and belonging.
“Grief and love are sisters, woven together from the beginning. There is no love that does not contain loss and no loss that is not a reminder of the love we carry for what we once held close”
— Francis Weller